Tuesday, June 8, 2010

My Phobia

OK, so you know how people sometimes have weird phobias? I know someone who is afraid of clowns and mascots, there's your typical fear of spiders or snakes, I even knew a person afraid of balloons. Perhaps my biggest fear was/is riding on airplanes, but I usually just hyperventilate my way through any flight I'm on. I never thought I had a really odd phobia until my girlfriends came to visit me this past weekend. There we were at Cape Cod, and we were strolling through town and landed upon a little store surrounded by...chickens. There they were, running through this rustic little yard, so I bought my friend a little cup of chicken feed because she was really excited about the farm animals. Now, birds kind of freak me out in general, I don't know if it's their eyeballs, or the pecking, but I tend to stay away from foul. So, I handed Brittany her little cup of chicken feed, and the birds started flocking to the food (I mean FLOCKING). And then I saw it. Their backs. Were bald. And I seriously have not been so grossed out in my life. Writing about it right now is causing me to have flashbacks and the gag reflex might be starting up. I would post a picture, but this would mean I would have to see the chickens. It turned out (as we were chatting with the local farmer who raised these disgusting creatures) that when the roosters "get really intimate" with the hens, they rip the feathers off their back because they have spurs on their legs. That night I couldn't even sleep because of the flashbacks to their bare, puckered skin. I began to process what was so difficult about this particular image for me, and I realized my phobia: Things that are bald that shouldn't be. I remembered back to various images in my life where some animal or something had little bald spots on it and it really grosses me out. Like really. If I wasn't already a vegetarian, I would have become one on that day. I'm not sure if it's the smoothness and the surrounding of hair, but please, if you suddenly find an animal with a shaved back or something don't show it to me, because you will see a very, very different side of Jess Miller.

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